MADISON, Wis. — Van Orden has had quite the head-spinning past two weeks as evidenced by his 75 tweets. From continuing to lie about BadgerCare funding to creating even more AI generated videos, you can find all the highlights (or lowlights) of Van Orden’s online presence this past week below.
DVO’S DADDY OF THE WEEK: Kash PatelWell, Van Orden yet again had to call in another member of the Trump administration to campaign for him in Wisconsin—and this time he brought out the big guns—everyone’s favorite FBI Director Kash Patel! You know, the guy who is making headlines every other week for being so bad at his job? This guy is so unpopular, his own party doesn’t even like him—18 percent of Republicans disapprove of the job Patel is doing. But hey—birds of a feather! Truly the similarities between Van Orden and Patel are neverending. Both dudes who use their positions to promote their own personal interests while having their lavish lifestyles funded by taxpayer dollars. Oh—and someone you might want to hide the hard liquor from at family functions.
REPLY GUY IS BACK!Listen, what people do in their free time is none of our business—but Van Orden is shoving it in our faces that his favorite pastime is replying to middle aged women to get a singular like on twitter. The target of Van Orden’s reply guy behavior this week? Controversial author J.K. Rowling.Seriously—does a sitting congressman have nothing better to do? Why is he in the replies of a British author commenting on her birthday hat? We don’t know how many times we have to say this—but this wouldn’t be a big deal if this dude wasn’t currently supposed to be representing Wisconsinites in Congress—but instead of doing his job, he’s more focused on using his status to get noticed by a famous author.
FAUCI DERRANGEMENT SYNDROMEOkay—seriously going to need one of Van Orden’s staffers to take away Grok because we need some new material for this newsletter! Van Orden once again decided to take to Grok to let his anger out—AI generating a video of Dr. Fauci repeatedly saying “I plead the fifth.”At this point, it seems Van Orden may have a case of Fauci Derangement Syndrome. We seriously cannot emphasize enough that this happened 6 years ago—and Fauci pleading the fifth is nothing criminal. It’s actually something his favorite daddy Donald Trump did nearly 450 times during his own criminal prosecution. Perhaps he is just aware of how politicians like Van Orden spin his words for attempted political gain—but Van Orden probably knows this—he just thinks his constituents are too stupid to see through his BS. WORST TAKE: Van Orden Saved BadgerCare by cutting funding 3 things in life are certain: Death, taxes, and Van Orden lying about securing BadgerCare funding for Wisconsin. Van Orden is once again trying to ignore the facts (in this example, a story about Republican policies costing Wisconsin over $2,000) to try and salvage his campaign.We really don’t have much to say on this—he continues to scream these false claims into the void and we are pretty much over it. This Whine Wednesday author is quite sure the voters in WI-03 are too; need we remind you of this headline:
NEW BESTIE: SBA Pro-Life AmericaIn addition to being J.K. Rowling’s newest reply guy—Van Orden found another account to get cozy with—SBA Pro-Life America. You know, a group whose very mission is to end all access to abortion care? Though, this shouldn’t be a surprise from Van Orden. Despite attempts to moderate on abortion, Van Orden has previously compared abortion to genocide and said victims of sexual assault and incest who seek abortions are “compounding the evil” of the assault.
P.S—There will be no Whine Wednesday or Thirsty Thursday next week as our Whine Wednesday editor will be on the road to hit the ground running to beat Van Orden.
